Firstly because you and your ex don’t have more than $100m and a team of nannies to ‘ease the pain’.
Further, they both contributed equally towards amassing their fortune. They both work and will each continue to earn stratospheric incomes. Although she’s in LA with the children and he’s in London, the cost of sending Apple and Moses (the children) back and forth with her team of nannies one way and his team of nannies the other is easy and insignificant.
Not quite the same as your divorce? You are not alone. With the greatest respect to Gwyneth Paltrow and her ex Chris Martin, it’s a bit ‘rich’ and pontifical for them to preach to the rest of the world’s lesser mortals, that your divorce could/should be like theirs. In fact it’s outright galling.
Gwyneth lays claim to introducing the world to “consciously uncoupling”. My translation of that is, “we have together made a decision that we will no longer be a couple”. A “couple”! They were husband and wife. They were and still are father and mother. “Uncoupling” sounds like two railway carts being shunted off in different directions.
So what is “consciously uncoupling”? It’s a “thing” proposed by Gwyneth’s Guru, Habib Sadeghi. Mmmm … It did not come from her nutritionist, personal trainer, stylist, publicist, manager, personal secretary or bodyguard. Do you have any of those? Conscious uncoupling is the process of seeing separation as a learning experience – “The ability to understand that every irritation and argument was a signal to look inside ourselves and identify a negative internal object that needs healing”. Give me a break! Gibson Winter identified eons ago that, “conflict is the gadfly of creation”.
The reality is, divorce is divorce. For everyone it’s different. What causes the marital breakup? How each party’s emotions kick in – cause and effect, is different amongst individuals. . Every case is unique to itself.
In Australia, nearly 70 per cent of all separations are initiated by women. Who knows who initiated Gwyneth’s and Chris’s separation. They spent most of their time apart, he touring and she on set. I can only guess they both said to each other “What about it – you want to uncouple? That way we can both get on with consciously coupling up with other people”.
Don’t you wish your uncoupling was so easy? Conscious uncoupling is for those who live another life on another planet, a long way from you and most other earthlings for whom divorce will be far more complex, painful and real.